MotherBaby Blessing

Every pregnancy and birth has brought a greater awakening and voice to my intuition.
Claire’s pregnancy brought me healing and confidence in my body.
Jack’s pregnancy and birth brought me deep empowerment and unlocked a channel within
Leo’s pregnancy brought me ritual among the dark tides. It brought me trust in myself and my path. A greater knowing. It brought me light.
Ophelia’s pregnancy and birth brought me vision. community. understanding and {un}knowing.
Ever since Leo Moon – I have valued ceremony all the more… valued finding my own way through ritual and ceremony.. finding what feels right and going with it.
Attention to detail, honouring something deeper – creating visceral memories with holy scents and hot baths, candles lit and holes dug in the earth..
My hands remember the way the dirt felt as I scooped the earth back into the tiny grave of a tiny son. How the cold rain fell along with my tears.
My body remembers the nightly, then weekly salt and essential oil baths in dedication to this womb. this body. this temple.. The candles lit in vigil at the bed side table, around the bath tub edge… all in reverence
My hands remember the way the pollen from the white flowers stained them while burying her placenta in gratitude, how the clouds parted and the sun shone.. and I adorned the top of her head with a crown of flowers and thanked her placenta for nourishing her well for 41 weeks. My hands remember the softness of her umbilical cord, as i spiraled it into a circle to dry, covered in rosemary and set in the sun.
The body remembers… and I need rituals to always remember, so that when my mind is soft and my hair is silver – I will always be able to call on the gifts and reminders of what mothering has brought to my life.

Instead of a mother rising in this pregnancy, I knew I just wanted  and needed something different..
it came to me easily – what I love most about gatherings is how they fill the well and space with energy for days and days after. Something to fill my well with and carry me on.
I would birth in this very space that I birthed my son… my midwife would be with me for two weeks postpartum… and then what? Who would be here to listen to my birth story? Who would be here to re-energize in this space where incredible stories have been told – where life has been made.  So, I knew that I wanted to gather with a tribe of women to celebrate the end of the fourth trimester – as we close on our BabyMoon… and to have women bless my daughter’s life ahead, and mine, as her mother.

I left it into the care and trusted hands of my doula to arrange… feeling slight anxiety of not knowing what to expect, of having no control, of feeling the need to host – to do something – to not be the centre of attention in *that* way. but I eased into it, and began to feel excited and ready… and still unsure of what to expect

oh… oh my. words can hardly express what transpired yesterday…

”I feel like we achieved something today” one of my friends said  — goodness… I feel like we achieved something for women. womanhood. sisterhood.. something greater than ourselves.

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It was truly trasnformative to be in circle with these women that came.. and they came, with babies in their arms and on their hips. With flowers they picked… with food to feast on together, and food to fill my freezer.. they came with poems and blessings  to read – that made the whole room laugh and cry.. they came with arms wide open and hugs with kiss…
they came with their whole loving selves – loving me completely and giving me the gift of seeing myself through their eyes..

The candles were lit, rainbows of ribbons tied..

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and as I sat next to my two friends both postpartum with me – receiving massages… I looked around the room and felt this rush of knowing. of body memory. of blood memory. of understanding – this is what it was before. this is how it was before we all separated into our own little families and lives behind four walls. Women coming together in post partum – bringing joy and food, bringing gifts of their company and meaningful tokens.
Feeling this woman’s hands so lovingly on my shoulders, while my other two friends with their wee babes on their breast and in their lap were massaged… while other women pottered around the kitchen, preparing plates of food and serving us water.. and still others pouring intention into making a book for Ophelia and me – filled with their words they spoke aloud earlier.

Oh my…
this is what we are missing.
this is what ever woman needs.
this is huge.

this MotherBaby Blessing was a game changer in healing from birth and moving on from the fourth trimester – birthed into the land of mothering, riding on the love, energy, and support of women who have come together for you. 

How lucky I am to be circling with these women…